When I was a sophomore in high school I dated this girl who was somewhat crazy. It was a snowy winter’s eve during Christmas break and I had just gotten SNL Trivial Pursuit. I brought it over to my friend’s house where my then girlfriend and some other friends were hanging out. Upon discovering that I had no intentions of devoting my full attention to her and rather Dan Akroyd trying to sell the Super Bass Matic, needless to say tensions mounted. After turning my back for a few seconds I discovered my precious gift missing. Later on my ex returned the box but not in the same condition she had taken it in when she went to hide it. To this day a giant tear down the crease of one of the corners of the box gawks outwardly to the world as if to say,”Look at this guy he clearly doesn’t care about his things.” Fuck that. The following is an inexact transcript of what happened next: ME: How could you do this? I just got this fucking thing! EX: Well maybe if you payed a little more attention to me. Who cares its a stupid game. ME: Stupid? I love this box more than I love you. Relationship over. True Story.

When I was a sophomore in high school I dated this girl who was somewhat crazy. It was a snowy winter’s eve during Christmas break and I had just gotten SNL Trivial Pursuit. I brought it over to my friend’s house where my then girlfriend and some other friends were hanging out. Upon discovering that I had no intentions of devoting my full attention to her and rather Dan Akroyd trying to sell the Super Bass Matic, needless to say tensions mounted. After turning my back for a few seconds I discovered my precious gift missing. Later on my ex returned the box but not in the same condition she had taken it in when she went to hide it. To this day a giant tear down the crease of one of the corners of the box gawks outwardly to the world as if to say,”Look at this guy he clearly doesn’t care about his things.” Fuck that. The following is an inexact transcript of what happened next:

ME: How could you do this? I just got this fucking thing!

EX: Well maybe if you payed a little more attention to me. Who cares its a stupid game.

ME: Stupid? I love this box more than I love you.

Relationship over.

True Story.

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